December 18th, 2008
6:12am… Today’s SHOCKING Stat: A new survey shows that 20% of teens have sent a nude picture of themselves to someone. That goes up to 30% for 20-somethings. MY GOD! What happen to the OLDEN days when you would get out of the shower and “accidently” stand in front of the large window in the living room?
6:18am… First Funny in the Morning!
Signs Your Dating a Hockey Player!
· Eating the last Fig Newton gets you bodychecked into the fridge.
· When eating steak, asks you to chew it for him.
· Constantly gets the urge to whack “Whiskers” out the cat door with a broom.
· It’s bad enough he consummates lovemaking by shouting, “He scores!” — was it really necessary to install the red light above his bed?
· When he tries to “Marv Albert” your back, there’s absolutely no danger of him breaking the skin.
· Talks funny and likes to beat up people, but doesn’t come from Alabama.
· Favorite Restaurant: Dinner in a Blender
6:30am… The Vikings - Timberwolves trip to Minneapolis is is FULL! We are taking 107 folks (plus 2 bus drivers) to the Twin Cities for a weekend of fun. Say ANYTHING about a winter storm that weekend… and there is going to be trouble.
6:47am… Today is National Wear a Plunger on Your Head Day.
7:12am… Why do men blow money on women? A University of Michigan study found that men are wired by evolution to try to impress women by spending too much money. Trust me, my wife knows… I am NOT wired that way. Insecure men are the one’s who spend WAY more than they should on their significant other – it is their attempt to overcome their overall lack of charm or wit.
7:30am… If you are a women, you should read THIS article. Heck, if you are a MAN, you should read THIS article. The story is from the Lincoln Journal Star. (Make sure you click BACK, though.
8:17am… What Else is Going on?
· A new study finds people who snore burn more calories while snoozing than those who do not snore. 
Scientists found that the more severe a patient’s snoring the more calories they regularly burned while sleeping.
· An Australian gambler is suing a casino, claiming they should have stopped him from running up a $909 million gambling debt.
· Police in Berks County, Pennsylvania have arrested John E. Hammond Jr. 31, and Jamie Lee Custer, also 31. These two geniuses swiped an antique religious statue — valued at $100,000 — from a local shrine then chopped it up and sold for its scrap value — $952.
· The New York Times has unearthed a bizarre detail about Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich: aides must keep his black Paul Mitchell hairbrush on hand at all times.
The Times also reports that, according to former employees, Blago rarely turns up for work at his official state office in Chicago, is unapologetically late to almost everything, and can treat employees with disdain, cursing and erupting in fury for failings as mundane as neglecting to have at hand at all times….. the…. aforementioned…. hair brush.
Impossible Question: THIS is most read in the bathroom. What is it? Answer: Labels Winner: Bill Bittner from Sioux Falls, South Dakota