6:06am… The start of a lot of STEVE on the air today.  Erin and Matt are gone today, so Steve and (whoever else) will also be manning the 4-6pm slot.  Can anyone think of interesting talk topics for this afternoon?

6:18am…
Things Not to Do While Drinking
· Drunken-dial your wife. While she’s in the hospital. In labor.
· Trim your ear hair with a steak knife.
· Get married.
· Phone your mother.
· Any sort of attempt to get into the Guinness Book of Records.
· Allow yourself to be videotaped.
· Climb that tree you were never able to as a kid.
· Go into a U.S. Army recruiting office.
· Perform a circumcision. On a bear.
· Read “Chitty Chitty Bang Bang” aloud to the class.
· Explain to your wife how you love her more every year, because every year there’s more of her to love.

6:36am… Sen. John Kerry reportedly is hoping to become Secretary of State.  GREAT NEWS, right?  I mean, if an emeny threatens America, Kerry will simply talk to them until they slip into a deep coma… JOHN! Why the long face? (An oldie, but a goodie)

7:04am… President Bush’s dog, Barney, bit a White House reporter when he tried to pet him.  Laura Bush says it may have been Barney’s way of saying “He was done with the Paparazzi.”  Check out the video:

The National Toy Hall of Fame has inducted "The Stick". Listen: Stick

7:57am... Michelle hates me. Listen: She Hate Me

8:45am... However, Wendy LOVES me. Listen: Wendy Nice

Impossible Question: We spend $4-billion a year to get rid of THESE.  What are they?  Answer: Headaches Winner: Bob Koller from Tea, South Dakota